'Tis Better to Say Nothing?

Okay, we kind of touched on this in the whole "Pact" thread, but I want y'all's thoughts...

When you come across a piece that needs a lot of work (by no means a worthless piece, but rather something which, as you read, leaves you with a great deal more suggestions and critical material to offer than praise), how do you best handle it?

Personally, I would prefer that my reviewers give me the whole truth, even if it hurts. Of course I don't want to be lambasted, but if most of what they have to offer is critical, then that's probably going to be the review that most helps me improve. But I've learned through harsh lessons on both sides that not everyone feels that way - particularly in such a public venue - and nor is everyone necessarily in a place with their writing where they are ready for that sort of pointed feedback, however accurate and helpful it may be.

So what do you do? Do you say what you've got to say, give it the most positive, supportive spin you can, and just cross your fingers in hopes that you haven't scared away the next Hemingway? Do you keep it short and sweet, curbing the majority of your thoughts and suggestions in order to maintain the positive/critical feedback balance? Do you send the author a private message so as not to risk causing (or incurring) public humiliation and/or outrage? Or do you just keep your mouth [keyboard] shut and don't say anything at all? Where is the line to be drawn in this social and public yet isolated and largely anonymous environment?

The mere act of translating one's thoughts into writing is a brave one - this we know. We also know how scary it is to then offer those thoughts up to the scrutiny of our peers. At the same time, we do so in order to learn and improve, do we not? So where is that line? What is appropriate, what is proper, and what is best?

Your thoughts and feedback would be tremendously helpful to this socially stunted and awkward reader and reviewer.

Thanks,

lilah

This is a really good subject and I'm glad you brought it up.

In case anyone's noticed, I tend to be more detailed abou what I think needs work in a piece. I think it is extremely important to tell the person what IS working, what is good about (because there's ALWAYS something good, and what was good writing.

However, I also feel that we are searching to improve. I guess I can be pretty blunt sometimes but the intention is always to help and I would never be cruel. Believe me, I come from a hard-core writing community and there are a handful there who are CRUEL.

I think honest, if a tad brutal criticism is needed for a writer to really understand where to improve. I expect it from anyone I submit my work to, and too often my friends are too gentle. They tell me what's great and what they liked and while that's nice to hear, it's not entirely helpful since I KNOW my stuff is not bullet proof.

However, these competitions are a whole other ball of wax. Here, what's done is done. There is no taking our suggestions and reworking and resubmitting. So I find it somewhat uncomfortable giving my usual critique. I still do, but it's not the same.

So I guess this can serve as a mini-warning...I'm NEVER going to be cruel or say something dishonest. But I WILL say what doesn't work for me with pure intention of helping.

I think, as writers looking to improve, we should DEMAND that.

Personally, I don't condone cruelty. Brutal honesty? Yes. But the cruelty I spoke of at the other writing community was not in the vein of helping, it was for the edification of the "reviewer's" own scathing wit. E.G.: (paraphrase, but not much) "...for writing like this, you are deserving of having broken glass shoved into every available orifice."

Cruelty is for the reviewer to feel better about herself, brutal honesty is for the writer. I prefer the latter. :)

Yeah, I use caps for emphasis because I hate the italic code here. I prefer and am more used to HTML. But I'm not rabid, I swear. :P

The only way I grow as a writer is to be critiqued with honesty and brutality. So bring it on. At the same time, though, feed my ego a bit so I'll want to improve. 

Trill, I am sorry to hear about any emotional wreckage...  I do get wrecked, too.  But my bottom line is one of very strong self, and self-defense.  Cruel people, especially the nonchalant, entitled, "hey, I didn't know" kind, are a terrible scourge on humanity.  I have no interest in trying to reach common ground with such folks.  In fact, it is one of the few areas that I am sad to admit I entirely lack compassion and don't lament the fact.  :\

And they vilify you?  Wow.  Are these folks some kind of ultra-successful writers?  If not, time to lose the whole circle of friends.  Sounds like they'd rather be sitting in a circle of their own, if you know what I mean...

JoeK