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What did you botch?

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    Posted: 13 Sep 2021 at 1:07pm
Realized I used a word wrong in my story. I'd meant to go back and revisit, but ran out of time and forgot. 

I had a wife that "tousled" her husband's hair when she was only meant to be gently rubbing her fingers through it affectionately. I just couldn't think of a more concise way to say it. Felt like an idiot after I submitted and realized I just could have said "stroked." Ugh. Oh well!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote LadyArkham Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Sep 2021 at 1:19pm
I feel like "tousled" still falls into the "affectionate caress" category - I don't think that's bad at all. 


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote Reasonably_Crazy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Sep 2021 at 1:21pm
I just noticed in my synopsis that I swapped out the character's title for his name, but left in the article, so it says "the Davis fears..."

Welp.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (2) Thanks(2)   Quote GenieAZ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Sep 2021 at 1:25pm
A beta reader caught me calling the main character by another’s name, after I submitted.  Thankfully, I was able to re-submit!  That was quite a boner!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Maximum Dynamite Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Sep 2021 at 1:35pm
Originally posted by LadyArkham LadyArkham wrote:

I feel like "tousled" still falls into the "affectionate caress" category - I don't think that's bad at all.


Well, phew, then. To me it always implied a more vigorous rub, like something you'd do to a kid or someone you were teasing. That meaning didn't fit the moment to me. But if "tousle" can be broader than that, that's a relief! 

I'm sure anyone else who reads my story will be going, "really? THAT'S what was bothering you about your story?" I have other concerns, too...that was just the easiest to describe. :)


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote NERdling Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Sep 2021 at 1:35pm
I changed a sentence from passive to active voice in my revision process. I didn't read it through a second time and it just makes the whole section sound off. I'm sure there's a sentence structure reason for it that I don't know the name of.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (3) Thanks(3)   Quote Maximum Dynamite Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Sep 2021 at 1:38pm
Originally posted by Reasonably_Crazy Reasonably_Crazy wrote:

I just noticed in my synopsis that I swapped out the character's title for his name, but left in the article, so it says "the Davis fears..."

Welp.
He's just such a profound figure, that's what they call him. There are no other Davises before him.

The Davis abides...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote ihavenoprocess Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Sep 2021 at 1:39pm
I used the word "immense" twice to describe different things. I guess everything in my story will just be "immense" - so frustrating that I can't change it! Might as well have said everything is "yuge."
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote FerretKittyMom Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Sep 2021 at 1:41pm
Procrastinated because I didn't like my genre (political satire) so didn't have time for Beta before I submitted it lol
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Maximum Dynamite Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 13 Sep 2021 at 1:43pm
Originally posted by GenieAZ GenieAZ wrote:

A beta reader caught me calling the main character by another’s name, after I submitted.  Thankfully, I was able to re-submit!  That was quite a boner!

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