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Introducing character

Printed From: NYC Midnight : Creative Writing & Screenwriting
Category: GENERAL DISCUSSION
Forum Name: Screenwriting Bar & Lounge
Forum Description: Discuss NYC Midnight Screenwriting Competitions or Screenwriting in general.
URL: https://forums.nycmidnight.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=20962
Printed Date: 20 Oct 2019 at 9:34am
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Topic: Introducing character
Posted By: Suave
Subject: Introducing character
Date Posted: 13 Apr 2019 at 10:23pm
If someone is to be introduced as Mr. Smith and is also known as Father by others, how do I do that in introducing him?  Any help will be appreciated!


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Replies:
Posted By: Random
Date Posted: 13 Apr 2019 at 10:37pm
Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

If someone is to be introduced as Mr. Smith and is also known as Father by others, how do I do that in introducing him?  Any help will be appreciated!


This is my father, Mr. Smith.  He's been watching you for a long...time...it seems this character has been given...two lives...

If you start with Father it would seem mister follows, otherwise start with mister and make the Father a reveal later.  I'm not convinced there's a right or wrong, just sequence and making sure the reader knows we're talking about the same person.


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Posted By: Suave
Date Posted: 13 Apr 2019 at 10:44pm
I was thinking:  Mr Smith (father, 80')


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https://bit.ly/2m1BzH0" rel="nofollow - FFC R2 HAUNTED
https://bit.ly/32r9dq9 MF A Knock at the Door


Posted By: Random
Date Posted: 13 Apr 2019 at 10:46pm
Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

I was thinking:  Mr Smith (Grandfather 80')


Works.  Make the rest a reveal when it matters.


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Posted By: Suave
Date Posted: 13 Apr 2019 at 10:53pm
Originally posted by Random Random wrote:

Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

I was thinking:  Mr Smith (Grandfather 80')


Works.  Make the rest a reveal when it matters.


Thanks, I think that will get the point across, though when he is talking to his son/daughter I wonder if I should label him Mr. Smith or Father in the heading above the conversation?  Perhaps if I introduce him as, FATHER (Mr. Smith, 80') as I will be using the father far more often and it gives the conversation a homey feel.


-------------
https://tiny.cc/0dxmez" rel="nofollow - SSP R1 Harbinger's War
https://bit.ly/2m1BzH0" rel="nofollow - FFC R2 HAUNTED
https://bit.ly/32r9dq9 MF A Knock at the Door


Posted By: Random
Date Posted: 13 Apr 2019 at 11:24pm
Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

Originally posted by Random Random wrote:

Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

I was thinking:  Mr Smith (Grandfather 80')


Works.  Make the rest a reveal when it matters.


Thanks, I think that will get the point across, though when he is talking to his son/daughter I wonder if I should label him Mr. Smith or Father in the heading above the conversation?  Perhaps if I introduce him as, FATHER (Mr. Smith, 80') as I will be using the father far more often and it gives the conversation a homey feel.


What if Mr. Smith wears a priest's collar and a skirt (cassock, kilt, whatever).  Show he's a Father, or waste a few words of dialog.  So happy you've taken over the parish, Father.


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Posted By: Suave
Date Posted: 13 Apr 2019 at 11:28pm
Originally posted by Random Random wrote:

Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

Originally posted by Random Random wrote:

Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

I was thinking:  Mr Smith (Grandfather 80')


Works.  Make the rest a reveal when it matters.


Thanks, I think that will get the point across, though when he is talking to his son/daughter I wonder if I should label him Mr. Smith or Father in the heading above the conversation?  Perhaps if I introduce him as, FATHER (Mr. Smith, 80') as I will be using the father far more often and it gives the conversation a homey feel.


What if Mr. Smith wears a priest's collar and a skirt (cassock, kilt, whatever).  Show he's a Father, or waste a few words of dialog.  So happy you've taken over the parish, Father.


Me thinks you be getting a little too far a field for me now . . .


-------------
https://tiny.cc/0dxmez" rel="nofollow - SSP R1 Harbinger's War
https://bit.ly/2m1BzH0" rel="nofollow - FFC R2 HAUNTED
https://bit.ly/32r9dq9 MF A Knock at the Door


Posted By: Random
Date Posted: 13 Apr 2019 at 11:55pm
Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

Originally posted by Random Random wrote:

Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

Originally posted by Random Random wrote:

Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

I was thinking:  Mr Smith (Grandfather 80')


Works.  Make the rest a reveal when it matters.


Thanks, I think that will get the point across, though when he is talking to his son/daughter I wonder if I should label him Mr. Smith or Father in the heading above the conversation?  Perhaps if I introduce him as, FATHER (Mr. Smith, 80') as I will be using the father far more often and it gives the conversation a homey feel.


What if Mr. Smith wears a priest's collar and a skirt (cassock, kilt, whatever).  Show he's a Father, or waste a few words of dialog.  So happy you've taken over the parish, Father.


Me thinks you be getting a little too far a field for me now . . .


If I were any farther afield right now I would be in a completely different contest.  I thought 'Alien' was a comedy, and they give me horror?  I suppose I should go read some entries.


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Posted By: ChristiLB
Date Posted: 14 Apr 2019 at 3:28am
Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

Originally posted by Random Random wrote:

Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

I was thinking:  Mr Smith (Grandfather 80')


Works.  Make the rest a reveal when it matters.


Thanks, I think that will get the point across, though when he is talking to his son/daughter I wonder if I should label him Mr. Smith or Father in the heading above the conversation?  Perhaps if I introduce him as, FATHER (Mr. Smith, 80') as I will be using the father far more often and it gives the conversation a homey feel.

I’ve read screenplays where both titles are written above dialogue (FATHER/MR. SMITH) It probably doesn’t matter too much unless you have more than 1 father in your script.



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