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...since we don't have anything better to do...

Printed From: NYC Midnight : Creative Writing & Screenwriting
Category: GENERAL DISCUSSION
Forum Name: Screenwriting Bar & Lounge
Forum Description: Discuss NYC Midnight Screenwriting Competitions or Screenwriting in general.
URL: https://forums.nycmidnight.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=19715
Printed Date: 07 Dec 2019 at 3:10pm
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Topic: ...since we don't have anything better to do...
Posted By: Random
Subject: ...since we don't have anything better to do...
Date Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 4:28pm
Ladies...what kind of comments/actions from men at work set your teeth on edge without crossing the line into territory where you feel compelled to do something about it?  More along the line of low level annoyances that give people reputations but don't result in burning at the stake.

This is for a project I'm working on, of course.

"I'm a writer.  Anything you say might end up in a story some day"


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Replies:
Posted By: manifestlynot
Date Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 6:56pm
GREAT question!

1. “That’s not important right now.” To a point that I feel is VERY important, and when a man brings it up in 30 minutes, it’s agreed to be very important.

2. General mansplaining. Using oversimplified language to explain what I just said, back to me.

3. Using a woman as a buffer to another woman. See: “special prosecutor for the Kavanaugh hearing” as an example.

4. “I don’t know how she does it.” Mostly said by husbands about their wives. I’ll tell you how she does it - she gets less sleep, takes less time for herself, has more responsibilities, and complains less. That’s how she does it. (Also in this category is referring to a dad watching his children as “babysitting.”)

5. Asking a female colleague at the same professional level to take care of office housekeeping (party planning, ordering lunch for clients, cleaning, etc)

If you’re looking for coded raunchy comments, that’s a whole new list, lol.


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Short Screenplay R1: http://bit.ly/2oPniPv" rel="nofollow - The Farmer's Fortune
FFCH3: https://bit.ly/379M2Ue" rel="nofollow - Sacred Silence


Posted By: MissKeister
Date Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 6:56pm
Any repeated action will set me to saying something, if it goes on long enough!  It also depends on the man.  I'll be much more with a man I'm friends with touching my arm (shoulder, whatever) than some guy I don't know well.  

One that got to me though was never calling me by my name.  It was always something cutesie, too.  Got me on the 'wrong' day and I gave him the "Tootsie" speech almost verbatim -- and whaddya know, he never called me a cutesie thing again!

I recommend watching "Tootsie" for research if you haven't seen it yet. 


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SSC R1 G24 - https://bit.ly/2VOxx2x" rel="nofollow - Chopsticks & Chopin


Posted By: manifestlynot
Date Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 7:00pm
Originally posted by MissKeister MissKeister wrote:

Any repeated action will set me to saying something, if it goes on long enough!  It also depends on the man.  I'll be much more with a man I'm friends with touching my arm (shoulder, whatever) than some guy I don't know well.  

One that got to me though was never calling me by my name.  It was always something cutesie, too.  Got me on the 'wrong' day and I gave him the "Tootsie" speech almost verbatim -- and whaddya know, he never called me a cutesie thing again!

I recommend watching "Tootsie" for research if you haven't seen it yet. 

Yup the name thing!! “Sweetie” or “babe” are common offenders.


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Short Screenplay R1: http://bit.ly/2oPniPv" rel="nofollow - The Farmer's Fortune
FFCH3: https://bit.ly/379M2Ue" rel="nofollow - Sacred Silence


Posted By: MissKeister
Date Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 7:24pm
Oh, another!

I've had men say (several times... but women too) it's great I work but really I should be home with my children.

Do I have children?  No.

Do I want them?  Yes.

Will I stay home with my children?  Hopefully I'm in the financial place to do that, but I may also want to work at least part time to get out of the house.

Is it their business?  Nooooooo.


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SSC R1 G24 - https://bit.ly/2VOxx2x" rel="nofollow - Chopsticks & Chopin


Posted By: Random
Date Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 8:11pm
Originally posted by MissKeister MissKeister wrote:

Any repeated action will set me to saying something, if it goes on long enough!  It also depends on the man.  I'll be much more with a man I'm friends with touching my arm (shoulder, whatever) than some guy I don't know well.  

One that got to me though was never calling me by my name.  It was always something cutesie, too.  Got me on the 'wrong' day and I gave him the "Tootsie" speech almost verbatim -- and whaddya know, he never called me a cutesie thing again!

I recommend watching "Tootsie" for research if you haven't seen it yet. 


Gosh...I haven't seen tootsie in centuries.  I'm not sure talking pictures were invented the last time I watched that.


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Posted By: Random
Date Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 8:12pm
Originally posted by manifestlynot manifestlynot wrote:

GREAT question!

1. “That’s not important right now.” To a point that I feel is VERY important, and when a man brings it up in 30 minutes, it’s agreed to be very important.

2. General mansplaining. Using oversimplified language to explain what I just said, back to me.

3. Using a woman as a buffer to another woman. See: “special prosecutor for the Kavanaugh hearing” as an example.

4. “I don’t know how she does it.” Mostly said by husbands about their wives. I’ll tell you how she does it - she gets less sleep, takes less time for herself, has more responsibilities, and complains less. That’s how she does it. (Also in this category is referring to a dad watching his children as “babysitting.”)

5. Asking a female colleague at the same professional level to take care of office housekeeping (party planning, ordering lunch for clients, cleaning, etc)

If you’re looking for coded raunchy comments, that’s a whole new list, lol.


Coded raunchy comments.  Now I want to start a whole new thread...I've never been good at code (or subtext).  Too much of an engineer.  Just show me the calculation...


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Posted By: Suave
Date Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 8:12pm
Originally posted by Random Random wrote:

Ladies...what kind of comments/actions from men at work set your teeth on edge without crossing the line into territory where you feel compelled to do something about it?  More along the line of low level annoyances that give people reputations but don't result in burning at the stake.

This is for a project I'm working on, of course.

"I'm a writer.  Anything you say might end up in a story some day"


We'll just call you "Stir" from this point on.


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https://tiny.cc/0dxmez" rel="nofollow - SSP R1 Harbinger's War
https://bit.ly/2m1BzH0" rel="nofollow - FFC R2 HAUNTED
https://bit.ly/32r9dq9 MF A Knock at the Door


Posted By: Random
Date Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 8:31pm
Originally posted by Suave Suave wrote:

Originally posted by Random Random wrote:

Ladies...what kind of comments/actions from men at work set your teeth on edge without crossing the line into territory where you feel compelled to do something about it?  More along the line of low level annoyances that give people reputations but don't result in burning at the stake.

This is for a project I'm working on, of course.

"I'm a writer.  Anything you say might end up in a story some day"


Well just call you "Stir" from this point on.


Hold that thought another day...


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Posted By: LiseeJD
Date Posted: 05 Dec 2018 at 11:17am
Do you want to ask your husband before agreeing to this?

You look great...considering you've had kids. 

You can always be my milf. 

Babe.

Are you on your period? (when I'm naggy about something.)

Calm down, Goldilocks.







Posted By: beckyrcollins
Date Posted: 05 Dec 2018 at 11:31am
lmao one time my boss flat out wouldn't let me carry boxes to an event we were doing. As in he took them off me, handed them to a male colleague, then told me to cover stationery. They were not heavy boxes. I understand he was trying to be kind, but like... I am also capable of carrying a thing. It was more of a faff working around his micromanaging. 

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https://tinyurl.com/rkw6qep" rel="nofollow - MICRO 2
https://tinyurl.com/y5krnlx5" rel="nofollow - SSC 1
https://beckyrcollins.com/" rel="nofollow - Website


Posted By: mysterycat75
Date Posted: 06 Dec 2018 at 12:28am
Walking right past me to talk to a man who knows less than half of what I know about the particular subject. 

Telling me I don't know how kids and teens think because I'm not a parent. (I've been a teacher for twenty years).



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CH 1, GRP 20, A thriller, a balcony, and a dog biscuit.

https://forums.nycmidnight.com/ch-1-grp-20-the-10th-floor-balcony-thrille_topic19367.html" rel="nofollow - The 10th Floor Balcony


Posted By: AnastasiaW
Date Posted: 07 Dec 2018 at 4:32pm
At this stage I’m compelled to do something about very little.
The other day a male coworker asked for help picking food for a meeting. Bless his soul I helped him. Obviously he doesn’t know how food works. 

Being referred to as ladies at work as though our gender is the most important thing and designating us as separate. Doesn’t bother me from a woman - then it feels like comradary.


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https://forums.nycmidnight.com/ch2-gr9-the-long-night-suspense_topic19779.html" rel="nofollow - CH2 GR9 The Long Night (Suspense)



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