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Alex Grey
NYC Midnight Black Belt Joined: 27 Jan 2019 Location: UK Status: Offline Points: 2012 |
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Hi Karlynn Thank you so much for your review - I am so repelled by the story that I'm grateful to every reader for enduring it and am fighting the urge to send round conciliatory tissues, chocolate and wine as compensation! You make a good point about the scene at the bottom of the well - as one of my other betas said "if the bottom of the well is so dark, how did she know what she'd landed in" - fair point! I have around 50 words to spare so I may have a cheeky edit before putting on the master list as a non-comp (Suave is setting this up for us). :-) |
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The.Black.Violet
NYC Midnight Regular Joined: 14 Jul 2017 Location: Ontario Status: Offline Points: 482 |
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Hey Karlynn! I read your horror story and wanted to tell you that I liked it! The ending was great and super creepy. I especially loved the line that you also use as your title. Super effective!
My biggest piece of advice would be to rely more on the atmosphere or your character's senses to portray the fear/discomfort rather than telling us that the house is "sinister" or scary. If you tell us then you're preparing us for the scare rather than letting it creep up on us. Nice job! Edited by The.Black.Violet - 02 May 2019 at 12:19am |
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