NYC Midnight : Creative Writing & Screenwriting Homepage
Forum Home Forum Home > GENERAL DISCUSSION > Creative Writing Corner
  New Posts New Posts RSS Feed - Introvert vs Extrovert
  FAQ FAQ  Forum Search   Events   Register Register  Login Login

Introvert vs Extrovert

 Post Reply Post Reply Page  <1 56789>
Author
Message
beckyrcollins View Drop Down
NYC Midnight Black Belt
NYC Midnight Black Belt
Avatar

Joined: 21 Apr 2018
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 2184
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote beckyrcollins Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2019 at 11:20am
Originally posted by bartelbysamsa bartelbysamsa wrote:

I'm an ENFP...-T I think. But I don't really know what the T means, which is actually probably fitting for my personality type (Probably lost focus at that point). That said, I can flit wildly between extrovert and introvert. I find that acting and writing tend to satisfy the different wants and likes of each.

Strangely, though I don't actually believe in at all, my star sign, Gemini, probably sums me up pretty exactly. I change like the wind!

"Turbulent (-T) individuals are self-conscious and sensitive to stress. They are likely to experience a wide range of emotions and to be success-driven, perfectionistic and eager to improve."

I'm absolutely the -T as well. Doesn't work too well with ENFP, when you get all these ideas, don't see them through... then stress the f out because you're not *growing* as a writer. This has literally been me this week so reminding myself there's a reason for all the emotions is crazy cathartic!  
Back to Top
Dekay View Drop Down
NYC Midnight Regular
NYC Midnight Regular
Avatar

Joined: 21 Jan 2017
Status: Offline
Points: 273
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Dekay Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2019 at 11:29am
Originally posted by Lisa_Who Lisa_Who wrote:

Originally posted by Dekay Dekay wrote:

Originally posted by Lisa_Who Lisa_Who wrote:

Though I realized long, long ago that to succeed in American society, especially in the American corporate workplace, I was going to have to learn to present a warm, nurturing, outgoing facade, so none of my coworkers have the faintest idea that I'm a raging introvert who wants nothing more than for all of them to go away.

I had to study end punctuation etiquette because people would respond to my emails wondering why I was so angry. 

Tips and tricks for any of my fellow female INTJs in the American corporate workplace:
 

I wish someone had given me these tips five years ago. I had to learn most of them through (I kid you not) recording observable human interactions based on my behavior. What happens if I straighten my hair as opposed to wearing it curly? (People take me more seriously with straight hair). What happens if I wear a skirt instead of pants? (More people opened doors for me or let me pass first in a skirt.) This list continues, but you get the point.

Tip #3 is especially useful for us, thank you.

I would like to add another tip: Befriend ENFPs. They are open to our unconventional behaviors, do not judge us as heartless robots, are a crutch in social settings, and they have a lot to teach us about the value of emotions.
Back to Top
Lisa_Who View Drop Down
NYC Midnight Addict
NYC Midnight Addict
Avatar

Joined: 23 Jan 2019
Location: Washington DC
Status: Offline
Points: 702
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lisa_Who Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2019 at 11:34am
Originally posted by Dekay Dekay wrote:

Originally posted by Lisa_Who Lisa_Who wrote:

Originally posted by Dekay Dekay wrote:

Originally posted by Lisa_Who Lisa_Who wrote:

Though I realized long, long ago that to succeed in American society, especially in the American corporate workplace, I was going to have to learn to present a warm, nurturing, outgoing facade, so none of my coworkers have the faintest idea that I'm a raging introvert who wants nothing more than for all of them to go away.

I had to study end punctuation etiquette because people would respond to my emails wondering why I was so angry. 

Tips and tricks for any of my fellow female INTJs in the American corporate workplace:
 

I wish someone had given me these tips five years ago. I had to learn most of them through (I kid you not) recording observable human interactions based on my behavior. 

I would like to add another tip: Befriend ENFPs. They are open to our unconventional behaviors, do not judge us as heartless robots, are a crutch in social settings, and they have a lot to teach us about the value of emotions.

OH, same here--all my tips and tricks (and I have like 20 more!) were learned the hard way. I wish someone had shared with me too...but you know, apparently, a lot of people don't even HAVE to consciously learn this stuff. :)  They don't even know there is something to learn.  It's a shocker when you realize that.

I strongly suspect my best friend from college, who is still my very good friend!  is an ENFP.  They get a lot out of friendships with us too, at least, my experience with her leads me to think so--we're handy walking pocket references/encyclopedias, we are serious and sensible when they need that, and they think how our minds work is fascinating. :) 


Edited by Lisa_Who - 01 Feb 2019 at 11:35am
Edgelords are a bore.
Back to Top
beckyrcollins View Drop Down
NYC Midnight Black Belt
NYC Midnight Black Belt
Avatar

Joined: 21 Apr 2018
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 2184
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote beckyrcollins Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2019 at 11:34am
Originally posted by Dekay Dekay wrote:


I would like to add another tip: Befriend ENFPs. They are open to our unconventional behaviors, do not judge us as heartless robots, are a crutch in social settings, and they have a lot to teach us about the value of emotions.

So. Many. Emotions. LOL
Back to Top
chrissie0707 View Drop Down
NYC Midnight Black Belt
NYC Midnight Black Belt
Avatar

Joined: 07 Feb 2018
Location: Indianapolis
Status: Offline
Points: 4005
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote chrissie0707 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2019 at 11:39am
Originally posted by beckyrcollins beckyrcollins wrote:

Originally posted by Dekay Dekay wrote:


I would like to add another tip: Befriend ENFPs. They are open to our unconventional behaviors, do not judge us as heartless robots, are a crutch in social settings, and they have a lot to teach us about the value of emotions.


So. Many. Emotions. LOL


That's why I married one.
Back to Top
Random View Drop Down
NYC Midnight Black Belt
NYC Midnight Black Belt
Avatar

Joined: 17 Nov 2017
Location: C. of Letters
Status: Offline
Points: 5401
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Random Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2019 at 11:46am
I'm INTP, but...

Originally posted by Lisa_Who Lisa_Who wrote:

1. Practice grooming.  You probably won't be able to stand routinely doing much more than a minimal hair-and-makeup routine and clothes that aren't a challenge to match, but you can still do a lot within these parameters.  If you look nice and pretty, people (of both genders and all ages) are already subconsciously predisposed to like you.

Or cut your hair really short.  Works for me.  I also wear a lot of black/dark blue.  I have some dark red shirts, but jeans go with everything...

Originally posted by Lisa_Who Lisa_Who wrote:

2. Practice smiling. Use a mirror, and test it out on family members, til it looks warm and natural.  This also predisposes people to like you, before you ever actually have to talk to them.

It's an interesting suggestion; Adolf Hitler practiced his gesticulations extensively in front of mirrors.  Speaking of mirrors, it's amazing how few people own one; I have to assume this is the reason they take all those selfies - because they don't know what they look like.  "Here's me in front of a white stone building"  That's Jupiter's Temple in Split and was completed before the Edict of Milan made Christianity legal in 312AD, but the building isn't as important as the ME.  Blech.

Originally posted by Lisa_Who Lisa_Who wrote:

3. Try to phrase everything in a form of a question, and include disclaimers reassuring them that everyone struggles with X!  even though you know it's not a f**king question, they just need to do it, and only an idiot wouldn't realize that BUT a pretty smile and a "Maybe you could try Y and Z--I know it's just not intuitive, what were the designers thinking?" will make them feel warm and validated.  And think you're warm and validating.

I do.  "Why haven't you tried this blazingly obvious thing that would have solved your problem two weeks ago rather than churning over unrelated symptoms?"

Originally posted by Lisa_Who Lisa_Who wrote:

4. Sprinkle emoticons (don't overdo it, but use one or two) throughout your email and end the thing by thanking them, even though they haven't actually done anything to be thanked for ("existing" is a low bar, but hey). 

Tongue   Big smile

This sig intentionally blank
Back to Top
Lisa_Who View Drop Down
NYC Midnight Addict
NYC Midnight Addict
Avatar

Joined: 23 Jan 2019
Location: Washington DC
Status: Offline
Points: 702
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lisa_Who Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2019 at 11:54am
The hubs is INTP, we understand each other very well.  Though he thinks I'm a little too rigid and I think he's a little too indecisive. :)  

Edited by Lisa_Who - 01 Feb 2019 at 11:55am
Edgelords are a bore.
Back to Top
beckyrcollins View Drop Down
NYC Midnight Black Belt
NYC Midnight Black Belt
Avatar

Joined: 21 Apr 2018
Location: England
Status: Offline
Points: 2184
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote beckyrcollins Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2019 at 11:55am
Originally posted by chrissie0707 chrissie0707 wrote:

Originally posted by beckyrcollins beckyrcollins wrote:

Originally posted by Dekay Dekay wrote:


I would like to add another tip: Befriend ENFPs. They are open to our unconventional behaviors, do not judge us as heartless robots, are a crutch in social settings, and they have a lot to teach us about the value of emotions.


So. Many. Emotions. LOL
 

That's why I married one.  

cuuuute

My SO's an INTP, a VERY interesting brain. He can look at any machinery and immediately like pick it apart and analyse it in his mind. Like how the pieces all connect to each other and what each individual piece does -- he SEES that. Complete wizardry to me. I'm pretty sure he'd say the same about my subconscious social skills though so we even out haha
Back to Top
Random View Drop Down
NYC Midnight Black Belt
NYC Midnight Black Belt
Avatar

Joined: 17 Nov 2017
Location: C. of Letters
Status: Offline
Points: 5401
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Random Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2019 at 12:16pm
Originally posted by Lisa_Who Lisa_Who wrote:

The hubs is INTP, we understand each other very well.  Though he thinks I'm a little too rigid and I think he's a little too indecisive. :)  


I can't speak for anyone else, but what's the point in a decision when SWMBO is going to change it for you?

In the likely event my answer isn't the one she's looking for the consequences are swift.  

Far more efficient to do what she wants.  There are areas and situations where I do what I want, but she's not involved in any of them.

Classic example; we carpooled in to work today, so she was awake while I got ready:
Decided which lights I should have on (not the lights I turned on)...
Told me I was getting dressed in the wrong location...
I was also preparing for work in the wrong order...
She would have turned right at that intersection...
...
...
...


Big smile

This sig intentionally blank
Back to Top
bleustick View Drop Down
NYC Midnight Black Belt
NYC Midnight Black Belt
Avatar

Joined: 07 Jun 2018
Location: Indiana
Status: Offline
Points: 1609
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote bleustick Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2019 at 1:13pm
I had to retake the Myers-Briggs just to remember what I had, though it has changed a little over the years. I am an INFP-T, though I know I tested as INFJ in journalism school and narrowly as an INTJ in engineering school almost 10 years later. Now my INFP-T verdict is by a landslide on all traits, it seems. So I'm a "mediator." Not really news to me there.

Guided by principles, led by purity of intent instead of rewards or punishment. Isolated. Fantasy worlds fascinate us more than any other personality type. Seek and value harmony. And so forth.

I am a hardcore introvert overwhelmed by crowds. I also happen to have anxiety and am empathetic to a dangerous fault, so I hit a lot of the stereotypes, I guess. Grew up quiet and weird and pretty much raised myself by books, easy with a librarian for a grandma. Plastered my walls with old printed out articles and images and drawings of natural and man-made disasters. Hindenburg, Chernobyl, Lusitania, Pompeii. I was an inexplicably gloomy guilty kid who genuinely believed all the wrong in the world was her fault and felt crushed by a spiritual debt for which she was constantly trying to pay. I still suffer from this a bit. Thanks to my mom being the hospital's IT, we had a computer and internet earlier than most. I developed a small fan base/community by blogging as a teenager (in ye olde days of LiveJournal) and finally had some friends, many who I met in real life. One took me to get my tongue pierced. Another took me to my first underground punk show. I attended another's survival party, a party to celebrate her resilience despite losing her rape case against a previous employer. I spent a lunch break with a Canadian Suicide Girl, who I'd known for years online, and her husband. The first birthday and Christmas presents I ever experienced were from cam girls (in the short-lived celebrity days of reality web cams that later inspired reality TV), slam poets, performance artists, alt models. I felt more connected and understood by these other people hundreds of miles away and generally at least 5 years older than me, than anyone I'd met in "real life."

I am that play-with-your-dog, color-with-your-kid person at bbqs and parties. Get me drunk or high and I might jump on a table and recite slam poetry about a go-go dancer with tangerine hair that lives in a giant tortoise shell, but then I'm still gonna go take a nap or hide at the library for a few days. I can play it straight enough to serve tables for a living, before I started trying to do writing full-time. And to take the kids to various classes, activities, and events. But I would nearly spend my life in bed with a book if I could. Even in the Navy, I spent literally every second chain-smoking and reading on the smoke deck of our ship that I could.

I can't make myself shut up when in a messaging/internet sort of format. But I'm practically mute in real life. Wink It is what it is.
FFC: 1 Candy-Coated (Pol-Sat) * 2 Love Beneath (Fantasy)
Back to Top
 Post Reply Post Reply Page  <1 56789>

Forum Jump Forum Permissions View Drop Down

Forum Software by Web Wiz Forums® version 12.05
Copyright ©2001-2022 Web Wiz Ltd.

This page was generated in 0.109 seconds.