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NYC Midnight Black Belt
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Random Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Nov 2019 at 10:45am
Got mine.  Standard rules apply.  "Why didn't you write a 10,000 word story, you ignorant dolt?!  I am forced to chastise you for not spelling out the back-story and provide more details!  Consider this a smiting!"


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ROS Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Nov 2019 at 10:57am
I am so happy to see the judges' comments. They remind me that indeed literature is subjective and not necessarily a reflection of the authors' ability or skill.

What one judge loved another one didn't like.

One gushed about what they loved while that same judge gave a one liner  about what needed work. And something that was clear as day in the story and not one reviewer ever indicated was unclear.

And the icing on the cake... The feedback is pregnant with spelling and grammatical errors. I wonder if they don't require a beta spreadsheet themselves. 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lookit There Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Nov 2019 at 11:01am
Huh. Haven't seen mine yet at all. Weirdly, my "results" email came about 45 minutes after everyone else, too. Still waiting...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Snarkmaiden Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Nov 2019 at 11:01am
I find that the better I score, the harsher the criticism. If you lined up all my judges' comments without the scores, you would never pick out the stories that did the best!
FFC R3: Angelic Assignments (comedy)
ShS R1: The Buggers Mean It (historical)
MFC R1: Sesame (comedy)
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote louciferish Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Nov 2019 at 11:02am
As I expected, my feedback is pretty much in line with what I got on the forum, with the exception of some tips that would be handy if I decided to rewrite the story for publication. (I've considered it this time, but I think it would need so much editing that I might as well just write a new story with the same characters instead.)

The only oddity that I didn't anticipate this time: my feedback is overall more positive than it was in Round 1, although this story scored lower than that one.
FF19, R1, Everybody Wants to Rule the World (12pts)
R2, Nothing Good (10 pts)
R3, Painless
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote KLNorman Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Nov 2019 at 11:04am
Originally posted by louciferish louciferish wrote:

As I expected, my feedback is pretty much in line with what I got on the forum, with the exception of some tips that would be handy if I decided to rewrite the story for publication. (I've considered it this time, but I think it would need so much editing that I might as well just write a new story with the same characters instead.)

The only oddity that I didn't anticipate this time: my feedback is overall more positive than it was in Round 1, although this story scored lower than that one.

I found that the more poor the score the kinder the feedback :) 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote aslepian Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Nov 2019 at 11:06am
Feeling very satisfied with my feedback...got confirmation that I was disqualified for not adhering to the mystery genre which was my biggest fear after submission. But the feedback was all extremely positive and encouraging and it sounds like it would have won the round if not for being outside the genre. Ah well, lessons learned! 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote charleycheval Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Nov 2019 at 11:09am
I just laughed out loud at the last line of my feedback:

I wonder if you can consider this but it's only a suggestion.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote beckyrcollins Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Nov 2019 at 11:22am
Originally posted by aslepian aslepian wrote:

got confirmation that I was disqualified for not adhering to the mystery genre which was my biggest fear after submission. But the feedback was all extremely positive and encouraging and it sounds like it would have won the round if not for being outside the genre. Ah well, lessons learned! 

How did you get confirmation of a DQ if you don't mind me asking? Was it in the judges comments or in your feedback email itself? 

It's something I've always worried about, knowing that it's there/ not there in the email would definitely ease the zero-scoring 'what ifs'. 

Regardless, glad you your feedback was useful!


Edited by beckyrcollins - 08 Nov 2019 at 11:24am
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote amlewi08 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 08 Nov 2019 at 11:40am
My feedback was really encouraging for the most part!  

The "what they liked" section was very kind!

When I saw how long the "needs work" section was I got nervous, but one judge literally wrote me a huge paragraph about how excited they were about the piece and ways I could expand to make it really awesome.  Also some base strategy on how to approach satire, which is so so so valuable. I'm very appreciative of their time and thoroughness and hope they did the same for other entrants.  Thanks judge {1689}!

One also suggested I take two real-life people who are 77 and make them younger.  Not sure if they just wanted me to lie about their age, or if they were suggesting that I set the story in like 1990. If the latter, they may be on to something. haha. 


also posted on my piece:


'WHAT THE JUDGES LIKED ABOUT YOUR STORY -

 {1689}  Great job taking full advantage of the location and aspects of a yoga studio. Many wonderful laughs as Chuck and Mitch adjust their poses. Wonderful exchange when they talk about how torn up Nancy is over the "stupid gun control thing." 

 {1952}  It's a very cheeky story and has a lot of good use of current events. It's even charming in its relationships.  

{1816}  It's a fun contrast to see Mitch liking his yoga pants feeling as he cruises on his motorcycle.  The blend of yoga and dialogue adds a complex layer to the story. It's comical to see these two men helping each other in yoga positions. Their banter is warm and funny and speaks of old friends.  


WHAT THE JUDGES FEEL NEEDS WORK - 

{1689}  Oh my goodness, you are really onto something wonderful here. Now I want to encourage you to explore the heavier and darker side of the circumstances you have placed Mitch and Chuck in. Then you can pull back and find a middle ground--which could be wonderful because, perhaps, just perhaps, you could folks of all political flavors to think about the hypocrisies and truly difficult problems that you are pointing at. So, as a starting place, think about this being the day where their pleasant sharing at yoga goes to pieces--where the tempers flare and everything inappropriate to the yoga studio environment flares up--and it looks the floor of the House instead of the floor of a yoga studio. Some general advice below may help that exploration, but I want to emphasize I absolutely love what you are trying to do here in terms of humanizing and lampooning these folks at the same time. Hold onto that because it's important and masterful. General advice: Satire, almost always, requires the exploration of the deeply offensive in order to expose hypocrisy hopefully in a humorous enough way to make us take a serious look at the hypocrisy that is being examined. That is the main reason, I think, that satire is such a difficult genre. As a starting place, think about Swift's "A Modest Proposal." In that mock essay, Swift suggests that we should eat the extra babies among populations that we don't respect. That is too horrible to think about, but that's the point to make us realize that the horror of his pro-posal has its roots in the horrors that we allow to exist. 

 {1952}  There's not a whole lot of action. It feels like it needs some drama to make it more engaging. 

 {1816}  This line doesn't fit the character: Mitch returned, holding the door open politely

Why does he hold the doo "politely" and what exactly does that mean? Suggest saying "Mitch yanked open the door and waved Chuck on in."

When we learn they are 77, this threw me off. Throughout I did not envision them this old. It's hard to imagine men this age riding bikes and doing yoga. Perhaps make them a bit younger - like 50-60.

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